One of the hardest things about being a submariner's wife is the silence. I haven't heard my husband's voice in over a month. I haven't seen his face on a video screen. The one blessing is e-mail, and as of today it has been two weeks since I've gotten one from Steve. It certainly could be worse, before the days of email families were allowed to send 6, 200 character "family grams" during deployment. How insane is that? But that thought doesn't cross my mind too often. What I think of most is how much I want an email. So my cell phone is constantly at my side, and any time I hear the little signal that I've received an email I check it right away. I hate being tied to my phone in that way, but I can't get away from it either. Even during my weird pregnancy insomnia where I wake up at 3am, I check my email.
The other morning I cried because my inbox was full of spam, but nothing from the one sender I would be overjoyed to see: stygersj. I'd say I was doing really well before this "silence" set in. I've noticed over the last few days that I'm more irritable, and cranky.
Thankfully though, after the tears had fallen, the Lord reminded me of one glorious thing. Though I haven't seen, heard from, or talked to Steve; though I don't know how his days are going, what he's feeling, if he's getting enough rest, or what he's eaten that day (weird, I know, but I'm always interested!);
The Lord does!
It is a wonderful comfort to know that even at this moment, Jesus is here with me, AND (who knows how deep under the waves) with my husband at the same time.
So I love and hate my phone, but more importantly I need to rest in the One who is with us both, in this moment, keeping us close.
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